Mom: I’ll be having my shoulders rebuilt by the doctor soon.
Tone: Really? Do you think you could get Gatling guns installed on them?
Mom: Gatling guns? Whatever for?
Tone: For shooting Gatles.
Mom: …


Our Realtor: What are some of the must-have features you want in a house?
Tone: A wizard tower.
Our Realtor: A what?
Tone: A tower for wizards, dark and pointy. I want to throw lightning bolts from it.
Our Realtor: …


Tone: Yo, dog, I heard you like diary so I put cheese in your yogurt so you can eat dairy while you eat dairy!
Appa (our dog):…

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